Things That Shouldn’t Give Me Anxiety, But Do (Part Three)
Doing introductions as a group while in a circle makes me panic about ‘messing up’ my own. I will sit there silently reciting my own introduction over & over again in my head until it is finally my turn.
People who share my name – I get nervous when I meet other people with my name. & this is because for some reason, spelling always arises. “My name is Allison/Allyson/Alison/Alyson too! How do you spell yours?” There is the pause of packed anxiety before the answer. “Oh, you spell it with two L’s…” & they trail off. & it is awkward because -one L or Y- Allison’s have led a different life than -two L, one I- Allison’s.
Going through security detectors – It could be as complex as the security at the airport or as harmless as the ones at the video store exit. I exhale deeply & step through as quickly as possible. & it isn’t connected to guilt. It is connected to fear of being innocent & the alarm going off anyway.